Podcast Transcript

SUMMARY KEYWORDS

belief, limiting belief, infinite possibilities, limiting, recode, life, laughter, believing, true, infinite, freed, pool, happening, absolutely, taught, great, possibilities, fearless, courageous

SPEAKERS

Kathi, Daisy

Daisy 00:03

Bald and Blonde. Welcome to the Mindset Evolution podcast. Hear about tips, tricks skills, tools, inspiration, mental hygiene, know what you want and how to create what you desire to achieve predictable results and create a content life wherever you are. And here are your hosts, Kathi Tait and Daisy Papp.

Kathi 00:27

And hello everybody and welcome to another episode of Bald and Blonde Mindset Evolution. I'm Kathi Tait the Baldwarrior, your host from Australia. With me, as always is your host from the Florida Keys. Daisy Papp. Hi,

Daisy.

Daisy 00:45

Hi, Kathi.

Kathi 00:46

Hey, you going today?

Daisy 00:47

Oh, I'm fine. I'm glad to see you. And it's just wonderful. I just so much enjoy these podcast episodes and the recording of them and getting ready for them. It's just a wonderful time in my life to do that. And I'm so appreciative of the many ears that pay attention to what we share. I'm so extremely humbled and grateful. Thank you so much, dear listeners,

Kathi 01:14

it is amazing to know we are reaching so many people around the world. As of 5th of August, Australia time, it was 55 countries, and we're super, super psyched. Don't know what it will be by the time we air in September, but you'll find out about it, I'm sure. So guys, last week, we were talking about victim mentality and it was a super important discussion to have because it has such an impact on your life when you get stuck in it. And I want to continue the conversation a little bit with today's topic because I think they're quite connected in that it's a choice about what you believe about yourself. So today we're going to talk about limiting beliefs. And I guess if we start with defining what that means, and then go from there. To me, limiting beliefs, beliefs you hold about yourself, that are actually holding you back.

Daisy 02:23

Mmm-hm

Kathi 02:23

Would you agree? I'm sure you probably have a bit of an expansion on that because you always have a bit more insight.

Daisy 02:30

Well, I don't know if it's more insight, I think it's a different insight. So that's why we complement one another so well, I believe; here comes the belief. That belief is an attitude that something is the case or that some proposition is true. Now, when I also then accept, because a belief is also something that I'm accepting, that statement is true. So I believe it, or the belief of. It is going both ways, good way, and bad way, or good way and not so good way, opportune or not so opportune way because when I believe I'm lucky, then I'm probably more likely to be lucky than when I think I'm so unlucky. And only two little letters make all the difference, lucky or unlucky, "u n". So therefore, when I continue believing that, now then therefore, our subconscious mind is really a great helper and supporter of us and our life. It, most of the time, I say most of the time, because I don't want to say always because I don't like the generalization, most of the time it's trying to prove to us that our belief is true. So when I believe that red cats are dangerous, hint, hint, Kathi has a beautiful red cat, Pepper, how he's called, and let's say I have the belief that red cats are mean, or the owners of red cats are mean, oh, now, who is limiting whom? Kathi just stays who she is and who she was and who she decides to be based on her behavior. But I'm limiting myself, how I'm going to explore my relation with her because I have that belief. So it is already limiting. Now it probably also will define my relationship with Pepper, because I will behave with him in a way that I may appear like not the friendly cat-liking person and then he's trying to avoid me. So then who's doing it to whom? I do it. So when I believe I can do it, I'm more likely will be creative until I get it or get it done. When I believe I can never achieve that, then I will not even be open to the possibility and then comes the self-sabotage in because my subconscious wants to be right!

Kathi 04:59

Yes, yes.

Daisy 05:00

And then therefore sabotage's me so that then, later on, I can tell myself, I knew it. I knew it. I knew it wouldn't work, I knew I wouldn't achieve it, I knew I would fail. So it's very, very interesting.

Kathi 05:12

So it seems to me that we've got to really go to the root cause here, don't we, otherwise, our brain is going to keep trying to flip us back to the old belief, because that's how the brain works. So we have to reprogram the old belief so we're flipping back to a good belief. Is that the crux of it there?

Daisy 05:32

I think you said it's quite very easy to understand. Very good, very good point. Now, that's the reason why I named my brand selfrecoding. So that you're recoding, you're giving yourself new codes, so you're able to update.

Kathi 05:47

Absolutely, yeah.

Daisy 05:48

An old belief that saved my life, let's say 10 times in a row is harder to update or upgrade or recode than something that I just randomly no, I don't like pine trees, I prefer palm trees. And then maybe one day I see a beautiful pine tree and I say, okay, so maybe pine trees are not so bad. So that's clearly easier to recode than when there's a bunch of emotional stuff hanging on to it, clinging on to it.

Kathi 06:15

Right, yeah, absolutely. And look, let's flip back, same as the last episode to my experience with alopecia because this is one that was recurring, for decades. And I know, a lot of our listeners are going through it too. So it's a really good example of how a repeating kind of experience can program the way you feel about yourself and those limiting beliefs. Because it keeps happening, your mind's going, because physically it's happening, it's not just you thinking it, it's actually happening and so it kind of cements these beliefs about yourself. I truly had those beliefs. I believed I was a freak. It was a self-belief that I just cemented every time my hair fell out again.

Daisy 07:05

And then you went out and you went to school and you met some friends, or maybe just youngsters who are not your friends, maybe children in the neighborhood or other students. And then because you had that belief, you saw through that filter of that belief, and already saw them in a very different light, not the physical light, but in a different light. You saw them differently than they probably have been realistically because you were already traumatized by that happening over and again repetitively,

Kathi 07:39

yes, super sensitive. Yeah.

Daisy 07:42

And then therefore you already received some, let's say, name-calling or, or look at her or some gossip behind your back. And then, therefore, you were reinforcing the belief, oh, I must be a freak. Now next time when somebody is in a bad mood, let's say you walk into a store, and there's just another child, and they just lost their last sense that they wanted to buy the chewing gum, but now they can't afford it and now they're really in a bad mood, just making this up. And they're in a bad mood because they lost their pennies or the cents or their $1 bill, and has nothing to do with you. But they look at you ah, ah, ah, grunchy, grumpy, unfriendly, and you will take it personally. Why? Because you already have that belief about yourself, well, I'm a freak, no wonder he must, or she must, they must look at me as if I was a freak because I experienced it so often, so how it was possible that now they don't think that or they don't consider me being a freak. Now here's the thing, very interesting that it comes to my mind. I had kind of a pattern in my life. I don't want to go into the details in this episode, I had a friend of mine who was teaching me, not consciously, but teaching me that my belief was actually not up to date anymore. And it took a year and a half for me to convert it because I didn't do it consciously. It was not something that I thought was a big problem in my life, and I want to work on it and get rid of it or change it or update it or recode it. And interestingly, it was so beautiful to see how persistent my friend was with his behavior, that he was just so gentle. He couldn't understand that I perceived specific situations as may be dangerous or maybe as untruthful or as maybe that could not be honest, this cannot be sincere, too good to be true in one very specific aspect of my life. And then because he was so persistent, I understood wow, it can be different too. So I'm very grateful to that friend, and if you listen out there, I truly appreciate what you taught me, unknowingly, but then you knew it because I shared it with you.

Daisy 09:50

 So a self-limiting belief, let's have a look where it comes from. We were not born like that. When you look at tiny children and little toddlers and then they crawl, and then they play, they think they can do everything and anything. You go there and you take out your toolbox, and you show them a tool for the first time in their life. And what they will say, oh, I know how that goes, I know. They have such self-esteem, they have such a belief in themselves, and then they want to touch it, then they want to try around until then some time later, maybe in preschool, maybe in school, maybe in the neighborhood, maybe in college, I can go further the steps. The further it goes, by the way, the more clipping of that creative mindset is usually happening, sadly, but that's a different episode. So when we then see that children then are actually taught, no, you can't do that. Girls don't do that. Boys don't do that. And then you start believing. Now, why do you start believing because you're presented with it more and more, more often and therefore you start believing it, even though in the beginning, you were maybe rebelling it and thought no that's not true. That's not right. That's not fair. But then we get accustomed to it and then we start believing it too. Actually, a self-limiting belief or a limiting belief is not something I truly honestly believe, unlimiting belief, that we were not born with. It was trained, conditioned. We were taught, we learned it somehow.

Kathi 11:22

Absolutely. I do think that's very clear. Like you do, you look at little babies and toddlers, and they're absolutely invincible (laughter).

Daisy 11:33

Unstoppable, too.

Kathi 11:34

 Yeah, just used to make me laugh. They're just gorgeous, that fearlessness and that curiosity and that excitement of everything. It's one of the great joys of little ones, isn't it?

Daisy 11:48

Yes. And they're fully in love with themselves. They find their little fists so exciting and so delicious, that they suck on it, they suck on their little toes, and they think they're just beautiful. They giggle about themselves because they can touch this and that. And they're just happy being themselves. So I really, really believe it is just about time to get back there. No, not become toddlers, again, not become babies again. No, but find that self-appreciation again, find that wonder within you again, find that curiosity again, find that spark that inspiration. And then it is so exciting to see the world again, with curiosity, take that moment and smell that ocean breeze or smell that fresh air or smell that flower in the garden or where you walk by or smell that cake in the store. Why not? Or smell that peach or the fresh bread or whatever you're putting on your stove. Smell your skin, and when you're out of the shower, it's delicious, isn't it? Well, maybe we were taught it's not. I wonder if that's true or if it's just the belief. Ha!

Kathi 12:58

Yeah,

Daisy 12:58

See? So I really enjoy asking questions. I ask myself many questions. And I really enjoy doing that because then I'm maybe making those limiting beliefs more shaky. So they can implode or just move away or just be scared so they just disappear.

Kathi 13:18

I do the same thing. I have conversations with myself and use my logical brain to talk myself out of any kind of limiting belief that slips in. Have a good conversation. Is that a limiting belief? Is that really true? Or am I just used to thinking that way? Let's have a look at that and pull it out? Wasn't until my 40s I even knew that you can think that way. (Laughter)

Daisy 13:45

But it's also very good proof that it's never too late.

Kathi 13:48

Yeah, absolutely.

Daisy 13:49

It's never too late.

Kathi 13:50

Absolutely.

Daisy 13:51

It's always just on time. It's perfect.

Kathi 13:53

I tell you what, though, I wish I'd known this stuff much, much younger. Uh!

Daisy 13:59

Yes, and that's good. But please do not go back and actually blame yourself for not knowing before then.

Kathi 14:05

Oh no. Look, I say that with no regrets and laughingly because wow, what a great 20 years I would've had but it's all for a purpose. But if you're out there and only 20 like you got the jump start there, guys. Let me tell you this stuff that we talk about is gold, and it will change your life if you put it into practice.

Daisy 14:29

Yes, and I would like to add something about limiting beliefs that is the total opposite, the infinite pool of infinite possibilities.

Kathi 14:40

Yes,

Daisy 14:41

I like to use that term because it's purely positively phrased. There's no negation in it no limitation in it, infinite pool of infinite possibilities. When we just consider that for a moment. Please, dear listeners, take 60 seconds and if you want I can put a stopwatch on here, and just please think about an infinite pool of infinite possibilities. What if that existed?

Kathi 15:10

Do we give them a minute of silence because I feel like it's needed here? But when you first introduced this concept to me was quite similar to the way I already believed and I've just jumped straight into it because I think it's such a great way to look at life and to look at the possibilities. And I think that just having the open-mindedness to believe that anything is possible from this infinite pool of infinite possibilities can change the way you envisage things. Because when you have a limiting belief, it also limits what you can envisage, what you can create a vision for yourself of, if you're going to stop yourself with a limiting belief, you're never really going to have the vision to fulfill. So if you can look at it that way, you can see why a limiting belief can really get in your own way. So now that we've got right into what they are, and why they're no good, what can we do about them when we realize we have them, Daisy?

Daisy 16:22

First of all, celebrate that you realize that you do have them! Because that is just already phenomenal, phenomenal, celebrate? Yes, I found it. Yes. Because only when you found it, you can do something about it. When I'm unaware, then how can I know what I can maybe do for or against it?

Kathi 16:43

Yes, now hint from me, this episode is to kick you into awareness, people. Have a look at yourself, do I have limiting beliefs about myself?

Daisy 16:53

Hint, we all do, (laughter). And then when I catch myself, it's very interesting, then I pull myself out and I say, how interesting, I wonder where that came from. And then I investigate a little bit. Sometimes I find the root of it, so where it originates, and sometimes I don't. And then I bless it and just let it go. I say that's great. So I had it for so long. Who will I be without it? I asked myself that question. So who will I be without it? Well, actually, a better me, happier me, healthier me. Sometimes these what-if questions are very, very powerful. I love using them in my sessions and workshops because it's really it's just like a quantum leap that we can take. So what if, dear listeners, what if you were freed from all your limitations that you put on yourself? I'm not talking about limitations, for example, yeah, well, I would like to be two inches higher. Well, I can do that artificially with heels, but I cannot really physically become that much taller. Or when I say well, I would like to have a different shoe size, also kind of a challenge. Or I would like to have longer or shorter fingers or wider bones or higher cheekbones, whatever that is. So that's really not it, when that's the problem we want to work on, then that's a different way we work on that. It's possible to work on that too, to get acceptance or reach peace with that. But what if you were just freed from all your limiting beliefs as I click my finger? Who would you be? What would you do? What would you think? What would you say? Kathi, you now because you're my only listener at this very moment (laughter), so let me put you on the spot.

Kathi 18:42

I'm probably the only one that can actually reply. Yeah, I love that. And I always try and do the thing that you're talking about. So when you click your fingers, and it's this instant of anything is possible for me. That's where I think I route all of my dreams for our podcast, for the baldwarrior movement, for the books I'm writing and releasing soon. And for the lessons we want to take from your books and convert into courses and how we want to teach school systems to implement this kind of learning all those visions I have for us and we've spoken about together, they all become instantly available. That's honestly what happens in my head. Because I think perhaps I already understand how to think like this. it's so much easier for it to happen at the click of a finger. That didn't obviously happen overnight and I still catch myself sometimes too. And recently it's been a sleep issue for me. I haven't, hadn't been sleeping very well for a few months and I've found myself saying I couldn't,

Daisy 19:59

now you reinforce it,

Kathi 20:01

and I might, hang on (laughter) and I've solved that, so that's really cool. I had to pick myself up on it first. So if I understand, catch yourself with a limiting belief, and then turn it around and say, what if the opposite was possible? Would that be the way to go?

Daisy 20:22

You can do that with specifics. But we can also start practicing, what if I would be freed from all my limiting beliefs? I like to generalize in these cases because maybe some of them we are aware of, and some of them we are not aware of. I'm certain it's all stored in the subconscious mind so why not getting all of them when we can? And then let's see what's lifting off of us? So what if?

Kathi 20:49

Great, mass cleanout!

Daisy 20:51

So what if you were freed from all your limiting beliefs? Who would you be? What would you do? How would you speak? How would you feel? What would you see? How would you see yourself? And that is so empowering when we just stay in that moment for a moment? So what if?

Kathi 21:11

it's super exciting, actually, the possibilities can be so exciting?

Daisy 21:16

Well, if you do that, if you do that for seven days, and you do it, for 30 seconds, apiece, once in the morning hours, once in the afternoon, or evening hours, you really do that for seven days. So what if all the limiting beliefs are lifted off of me? Who will I be? How will I be? How will I feel? How will I talk, walk? So first, you can start with 30 seconds. But of course, it would be much better if you do it for five minutes or two minutes. So extend it and just be there because let's face it, where are you? Where you are? Let's face it, and then where you are, and that very moment, just notice how it feels. So how would it feel? How would I feel like when I'm freed from all that? What's, what would I do? Well, I would probably do that, I would probably go ahead and do it, instead of being afraid of it, I probably would talk to the girl that I find so nice and cute in school. Or maybe I would go out to the restaurant that I always wanted to visit or maybe I go for the walk again because I actually miss walking or maybe I go and rent a bicycle for half an hour and ride through town and then have a look because I wanted to do it. So start doing it because it will lead us to a much freer self and it is a process when we did it once, then we have already proved that we can do it. Now when we did it already, then now we have a reference. Now when we do it again, then we have a second reference. And when we build up that list of references or fill up that reference cup, or barrel, with all kinds of references that prove us that our old belief, limiting belief, is no longer true, it's very freeing.

Kathi 21:31

Oh yes.

Daisy 22:59

So as we are not obligated to stay in the limiting belief that we somehow developed, received, were taught, conditioned to, we can free ourselves from it. Well experience it and let me know your feedback. It is of course a little limited what I can give in this format because it's only audio, there are other ways how we can unlimit ourselves. And one more thing, maybe take a post-it note or a little sticky note or take a piece of paper and just write on it, the Infinite pool of infinite possibilities. Let it stand there, put it on your screensaver, on your phone, on your computer or on your tablet and notice what happens because wherever your focus goes, everything grows. Now when I focus on my limitations, I will be most likely more limited and more often limited. Now when I focus on my unlimitedness my infinite pool of infinite possibilities and then I can even envision. Why not fantasize? We fantasize so often, the stories we tell ourselves in our mind, how many of them are not true. I'm not saying any one of you is a liar, but we are telling ourselves big fat lies very often, way too often. So why not tell yourself okay, so I'm now connecting myself to the infinite pool of infinite possibilities. How? I don't know, I'm just connected. I tell you my phone is connected to the cellular service. How? I don't know. But it functions.

Kathi 24:32

Don't have to know how, just that it is. Yeah, I really like that. And I think that's one of the things you mentioned and then moved on was that these limiting beliefs can actually create a consequence of having these limiting beliefs is that we then are fearful of outcomes. And so one of the upsides of flipping this switch and believing in the infinite pool of infinite possibilities, is that it's also much easier to be fearless, I believe.

Daisy 25:10

When you run into a poisonous snake, be fearful. And if you cross the street, yes, look out for cars and motorcycles and buses and trucks. I think fearfulness can be very healthy. But we don't want to have the limitation of artificial fears that are not supporting us.

Kathi 25:30

Yes.

Daisy 25:30

We want to lift ourselves; we want to free ourselves from that. And yes, so I would not even use the word fear in that context. I would rather describe it as courage. We will be more courageous to do something new, being more courageous to maybe try something out. Maybe go for that walk, go to that talk. Go and talk to someone you find nice or you're curious about. So you will be more courageous, I believe. It's not the fear, I think.

Kathi 25:59

Well, it's interesting. I think when this comes back to words because for me, courageous means fearless. But for you, it might mean something a little bit different.

Daisy 26:10

No, it does not mean something different, but I know how the brain works. When the fear is already in the word, then the focus will always be on the fear and not on the less. So that's why I'm trying to use the word that's purely positive.

Kathi 26:23

Yeah, well, I like that, I think that's good. Okay, so fearlessness equals courageousness. So we'll replace the fearless with courage that works for me, I say fearless because I want to point out that fear's a choice. And yes, it can be useful when we're physically in danger, but I see way too much and lived it myself, of artificial fear of something happening that we created in our minds because of a past experience that then holds us back. So when I say fearless, so that's what I'm talking about. And I know that you know that. So to wrap up, we believe that limiting beliefs serve absolutely no purpose. And we need to flip them on their head and really focus more on the infinite pool of infinite possibilities. And one of the other things I wanted to say was that, you know, you mentioned writing it on a sticky note and going looking at it, I write it on my bathroom mirror, I live alone, so I can, but I think it's really cool. And all of the people I've worked with and encouraged to do mirror love with, who write things on their mirror as well tell me that it's super, super effective because you see it every day. But I will say every few weeks, rub it off and change it. Because when it's there all the time you stop seeing it. But I love that it's on my mirror, because when I go to claim my teeth and wash my face, and blah, blah, blah, it's right there. And it reminds me, so try that too guys.

Daisy 28:01

That's very good. Now, one more thing comes to my mind when we speak about limiting beliefs. How many of your beliefs are limiting others from being who they can be? So it goes not only inward, but it also goes outward. So when I have a limiting belief, and then I say, oh Kathi, you can't do that, nobody's ever done that, how you dare doing that? You see? So then I'm putting it on you, although it's mine. And now it's your responsibility to choose wisely, do you want to take my gift? Or do you want to leave it with me?

Kathi 28:38

I can so do it (laughter).

Daisy 28:42

No one ever said that you must take the gift. You must not!

Kathi 28:47

Yes.

Daisy 28:48

Choose wisely.

Kathi 28:49

Yeah, that was a really important lesson I remember learning was listen, but only take what you need, and leave the rest. That's okay. It's your choice.

Daisy 28:59

It's like in the restaurant you know when they bring you this big plate of food, and then you eat what you want. If you still want something, you take a takeout box and you take something home or not. Or they bring you something you don't like, it's like going into the grocery store. There are many items I don't like, but do I stand there in front of the shelves and let's say, bitch, why are you there? Why is that there? I don't want this item there, this item leave, go away. No, nobody would consider doing that. So we just move on. And when we can do that, because when you have a limiting belief, then I can appreciate you caring for me and probably you want to keep me safe and I appreciate that. And I do it this way and let's see how it goes. So I don't have to say Oh, are you trying to limit me again? No, I don't need to say that either. I can say thank you. I appreciate and then go about your day.

Kathi 29:53

Yeah,

Daisy 29:53

Wherever your focus goes, everything grows, start focusing on the great stuff and it is just so wonderful. It's so wonderful.

Kathi 30:03

I have to agree, it absolutely is. It changes so much about the way you experience your life when you think differently. So that's it from us guys, go write it on your mirror, or put it in your bedside drawer or tuck it in your purse, or I don't know, stick it in your car somewhere, infinite pool of infinite possibilities. Let's be filled with courage and look at life differently. You certainly will be happier; we can guarantee that. Any final thoughts there Daisy, before we sign off for this week,

Daisy 30:38

if you're interested to have a little deeper look into the infinite pool of infinite possibilities, have a look at physics and the possibilities and how many possibilities there are and quantum physics and this area. I think that's a good idea. So only if you're interested in going a little deeper. But when you already did a great step when you just put it on a note, or you put it as a reminder on an alarm clock every day twice, it reminds you, infinite pool of infinite possibilities. Oh yeah, it exists. And then it will open you up. It's inevitable.

Kathi 31:13

Absolutely. So that's it from us today. guys. Thank you once again for your time and listening to us and sharing with your family and friends. We love you. We love your support. We love to hear from you, so don't be shy. That's it. This week we are Bald and Blonde

Daisy 31:32

Mindset Evolution and follow us on Instagram, baldandblonde.live

Daisy 31:39

Thank you for tuning in to the Bald and Blonde Mindset Evolution podcast. If you love what you're hearing, please subscribe to our podcast. In our show notes, you'll find the link to our Facebook group where you can personally connect with Daisy and Kathi and the link to our website where you can find all of our previous episodes and much more of goodies so you can get more value. Please leave us a review on Apple Podcast or Podchaser, that really helps out the show and helps us to get some powerful feedback from you. Talk to you soon.